Emotion Work

The area of Social Influences in Emotions and Communication is an area that I feel could use further discussion. My reasoning behind this is that I feel that so much of the way we communicate is guided by the the framing rules and feeling rules that we live by that we would all benefit from learning as much about them as possible. If anything we may gain a stronger understanding of why people are acting in ways we like or dislike. Emotion work, which Wood (2010) explains as the "effort to generate what we think are appropriate feelings in particular situations"  is something that we all do even if we may not be aware. There are times when I question how others might view me if my communication (both nonverbal and verbal) were an exact reflection of how I actually felt inside. There are times when I am working on my emotions just to correspond with what I think is appropriate for each interaction in my life. An example of this is that I have empathy for others, and sometimes so much so that when a person is telling me something sad that happened to them I feel my tears wanting to come out yet I hold them back because I feel like this is inappropriate and may come of as "fake". I have also noticed that people often refrain from speaking ill of people in situations where they think they might offend someone else. I think that people can benefit from honesty even in situations where we believe that we must engage in emotion work so that we are doing what we think is the right thing for that moment. One example is that I wouldn't want a good friend to tell me that "things will get better soon "if they honestly believe that things won't get better soon. It would feel better to hear their true feelings and then an explanation of that truth than to hear something artificial and constructed.

Question Two

My favorite things about this class were the paper assignments. Writing papers have always been my least favorite part of any class, but I realized that when the paper assignments are something interesting and can be approached from personal knowledge as well as what we are learning in the course, they can be quite enjoyable. I enjoyed writing the relationship development paper in particular because I was able to learn about myself and my relationship. It also sparked up an interesting conversation with my partner because I was able to reflect on some of the issues I had early on in our relationship with my communication. My least favorite part of the class was that I felt that some students were not responding to different classmates during each weeks discussion. I think the easiest thing to do is click on the names at the top of student blog list which made it harder for the class to gain others perspectives each discussion. Improvements for this might be that students could be encouraged to comment on someone different from the previous week.

Question One

This has been one of the most informative classes I have taken for communication studies. I have learned a significant amount of information about interpersonal communication. The concepts that stand out the most are verbal and nonverbal communication, and the importance of nonverbal communication that people tend to overlook since people are not always educated on what to look for in nonverbal communication. Similarities include both forms of communication being symbolic, rule-guided, intentional or unintentional, and reflecting of culture (Wood 2010). The differences are that these forms of communication can replace the other in specific situations, and nonverbal can help us determine when it's our turn to speak, as well as helps us express our feelings about others. For example, we can show boredom as well as happiness without using verbal communication to express these emotions. I have also learned about friendship and romantic relationships, and the growth phases they go through to evolve or in other cases end. While completing my third paper assignment I learned about my own relationship while applying key concepts we have learned in this class including the growth stages that begin with our individuality that affects how we seek out others for romantic relationships. We don't often realize this while we are single, but it makes sense to me now that I have learned how this process works. The obstacles to mindful listening including message complexity and internal and external obstacles. Selective listening which one of the forms of nonlistening that Wood explains as "focusing only on a particular parts of communication" is something that I do often and learning about it has helped me learn how to be more mindful of it when I am doing this. Overall, I have learned communication skills and concepts that I will not forget.